The earth is the Lord's... and mine too

The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof…
I’ve been reading Wendell Berry poetry again letting my soul fill up. This man reminds me of all the men and women I knew growing up for whom the land was both work and play. In my reading this morning one poem called my name.
BELOW
Above the trees and the rooftops
is the range of symbols:
banner, cross, star;
air war, the mode of those
who live by symbols, the pure
abstraction of travel by air.
Here a spire holds up
An angel with trump and wings;
He’s in his element.
Another lifts a hand
with forefinger pointing up
to admonish that all’s not here.
All’s not. But I aspire
downward. Flyers embrace
the air, and I’m a man
who needs something to hug.
All my dawns cross the horizon
and rise, from underfoot.
What I stand for
Is what I stand on.
This week I have stood on fields rowed by golden hay shining in the sun, smelling sweet and clean. Standing on top of the trailer high with hay bales, I see the hillside pasture with bull, horses and donkeys surrounded by pines and briars. Walking to the stable in the early morning dew, the morning mist lingers in the valleys as the sun rises behind a pink rimmed cloud. The spring fed red clay muck sucks my shoes off and I squish my toes in the mud, a guilty pleasure of childhood once again mine. I pull weeds from the flowerbeds gloveless and black dirt rims my fingernails. What I stand for, I do indeed stand on and I give thanks for farm, family and friends.

If I Could Save Time In A Bottle...

If I could save time in a bottle… I would save the smell of new mown hay ruffled across the hills in sunlight. The sound of an old timer’s chuckle and a baby giggle, Appalachian Spring playing and dancers dancing, and Junie B’s good morning nicker would be in my bottle. I would save the smell of babies sweet from their baths frosted with lotion and love. The taste of mama’s fried chicken and Dairy Queen Soft Serve ice cream topped with a chocolate shell, Silver Queen corn on the cob straight from daddy’s garden, the first new potatoes soft and creamy melt in your mouth deliciousness would be in my bottle, too. The feelings of freedom and jubilation that were a part of my baptism, part of my music, part of my sacred dance, part of my art and writing… the times I feel God looking over my shoulder, lifting me up in a leap, guiding and applauding and loving me… These would go in my bottle.
Obituaries are one way we try to keep time in a bottle, I think. Our newspaper no longer provides free obituaries, just a one line death notice. The rise of lengthy obituaries, small short stories, combined with newspapers downsizing community news (no more cooking sections or news from the different small communities in the county, no more pictures of small boys holding up the large mouth bass they caught in Papaw’s pond) is an interesting irony for me. If we cannot have news of our neighbors daily lives that is not murder and mayhem, we can have an obituary that tells the stories of our lives even if we have to pay for it.
The Psalmist sings,” My times are in thy hand…Let thy face shine on thy servant; save me in thy steadfast love “.God is saving the times of our lives in the bottle of being that surrounds us in grace and mercy all the days of our lives. And when the times of our lives come to an end on earth, the time of our life is just beginning…
Thanks to Jim Croce for the song “If I Could Save Time In A Bottle…

Patience, Peggy, Patience...

I graduated from the Pick Up Thy Bed and Walk School of Nursing. After two days or so, my well of compassion runs dry. When the children were small, they had to be bleeding badly or on serious drugs if they expected to stay in bed more than one day. This lack of patience I attribute to my gene pool… an impatient father and a brusque German grandmother. Lowliness, meekness and patience are not my strengths. With old age approaching, I need to develop my patient empathetic self. If Michael doesn’t need it, I will.
Daddy was diagnosed with myelofibrosis , a disease of the red blood cells, in his seventies. Initially, monthly blood transfusions restored his energy and he continued to live and work on his farm. Gradually the transfusions came more frequently and his world began to shrink until he lived primarily indoors. A daily ride in the pickup truck to the back of the farm, sitting in his chair reading the Wall Street Journal, keeping up with the Stock Market, going to church on Sunday… this was his life.
My father was not a patient man. My sister and I dreaded him “helping” us with our homework. As a driver’s ed teacher, he loomed over the hapless student (my mom, my sister and me) like a gargoyle ready to pounce on the slightest infraction. Putting out the hay for the cows had to be done just so or a bellow would rumble in your direction from the tractor. But during his last illness, I never heard him complain or whine. There was grief for life coming to an end, sorrow over unrealized dreams and patience. My mother says he grew sweeter, softer as his illness imposed limits.
I looked up “patience” in the concordance of my Bible. There was a small list of references, not as many as I expected. One phrase caught my attention from Colossians 1:12… endurance and patience with joy. Therein lies the challenge. Not only must I endure and be patient, I must do so with joy! Joy? Dear Lord… I have and can endure. I can be patient for a season. But to do so with joy seems impossible. I read on. Paul is doing his theological exposition with verve and vigor, instructing the faithful. Rejoicing while suffering seems to have been Paul’s strong suit , so he regularly exhorts his readers to join in.
So here we are… suffering saints and grumps… called to joy in the midst of struggle, patience with joy, endurance with joy. Perhaps the daily practice of joy will provide a minor miracle for me, a transformation of impatience and grumpiness to an active patient acceptance of whatever comes my way. Dear Lord, teach me the art of joy in small things… buzzing busy bees in the new bee hive, the sound of Junie B’s voice, the smell of new mown hay… so that I might have joy when life is difficult. And if you could help me learn patience in all things bright and beautiful as well as all things dark and ugly, I would be grateful.

Outward signs of an inner grace...

Growing up in the Deep South on a farm before the advent of sunscreen, I always had a sunburned nose (at least) during the summertime. My fair skin came with a dose of small freckles that increased in number and size with exposure to the sun and age. The sun was courted for the gift of an even tan, a sign of elegance and beauty for our generation. We slathered our bodies in a mixture of baby oil and iodine to deepen our tans as we laid out in our backyards, by pools, lakes, ponds and beaches. Coppertone was a tanning aid not a sunscreen.
Trips to the beach were rare for our family. We were baling hay or putting up food from the garden during prime beach time. When my college Baptist Student Union took a retreat to a nearby beach, I went and spent the whole day in the water. Somewhere along the way I must have felt my sunburn setting in because I remember borrowing a tee shirt to wear as we played in the waves. By the end of the weekend, I had an ugly case of sun poisoning. My skin swelled, blistered lobster red, and I was nauseous. As the red faded, sheets of my skin began to peel off much like the shell of a boiled egg. It was not a pretty sight.
Fifty years later, I am reaping what I unknowingly sowed… pre-cancerous spots and basal cell cancer. Looking at my face, I can see the faces of a long line of farmers in my family, worn and weathered with brown spots from a lifetime of exposure to the sun. All those hours spent working and playing outdoors are written on my face and dermatologists read it like a book. Even though I have been wearing hats outdoors for years with sunscreen applied, my early love affair with the sun left marks that have not faded. My latest visit with my friendly dermatologist left me with four frozen spots on my face. Ironically they blister.
A phrase I heard frequently at baptisms in my church life… an outward sign of an inner grace… comes to mind now for some strange reason. These blisters, the scar on my nose from surgery serve as outward reminders of the inner grace that has come in the gift of my body. My body has been my teacher, my guide from childhood until now. To be incarnated in a body is an unimaginable gift even though most of us are not altogether pleased with our packaging. We see ourselves as too fat, too skinny, too tall, too short, big thighs, round faces, imperfect when measured against other bodies we see around us. And as we age, the free flowing fluidity of youth gives way to hitches in our get along. We long for the good old days when most of our body worked easily and without struggle or pain.
What if I could see these aches and pains, these scars, the gradual fading of strength and beauty as outward signs of the inner grace of being? Being a child of God, mortal, finite and limited but grounded in grace leads me to the Immortal, the Infinite, the Unlimited Loving One who called my body into existence. As my body changes and ages, gifts of the Spirit become ever more necessary. “ Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control…against such there is no law.” Thanks be to God for my body, the miracle of being and the reminders of my mortality. I pray my soul will be made whole even as my body begins to gently fall apart.