Sounds of silence...

One of the luxuries in my life is silence. The children are grown and gone so I no longer have the constant interior conversation of active parenting racketing around inside my head. Michael leaves for work and I am alone with the blessed silence... no music, no television, no radio... just sweet, sweet silence. Birdsong... the albino Carolina wren singing to her babies on the front porch... interrupts my silence and I sit and listen. The soft hum of the ceiling fan in our study is a slow rhythmical accompaniment to my slow thoughts. I survey my surroundings. My house would not win a Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval today. The leftovers from a Sabbath weekend flow around me in a river of disorder. I detach from the long list of “must do” and “can’t stand it any longer”as I settle into the silence.
And here I am, writing. Anne Morrow Lindbergh said, “I must write it all out, at any cost. Writing is thinking. It is more than living, for it is being conscious of living.” Writing has become my four lane highway to my soul’s interior landscape. I travel this highway almost every day and sometimes the writing car flies along, full of high octane fuel. Other days it sputters and stalls, dying in the middle of the road. Both trips are of equal value to me. The days I write effortlessly with clarity and poetry are intoxicating. When I struggle to find words or images that start my soul’s engine, I am reminded that life is never easy all the time.
--------- So much for the silence! Mama came in to tell me rain was on the way and I needed to go feed the cows before it started. It will be our first rain in a month if it gets here. I took corn shucks from Jeannie and cantaloupe rinds along as an appetizer for the hay. Our hay stock is dwindling at an alarming rate and I must find some hay to buy this week. David was getting ready to turn on the pump in the stream to water the small fall garden so I stopped to talk. As we stood there, it began to sprinkle a little and then stopped. He decided to turn on the sprinkler just in case rain does not come. We have had so many false starts in the past month... small sprinkling rains that just settle the dust but do not really soak the earth.
---------Megan calls. Matthew and Mason started school today so her morning was going to be busy. Yesterday at her church Maria, the Minister to Children, incorporated a Blessing of the Backpacks into worship. Children brought their backpacks to big church and were called to the front for a special liturgy and blessing. They had already received a special book from Maria in the mail earlier that week. So all of the children in that church have heard and felt God’s blessing of their new school year because Maria is being the face and hands and voice of God just for them.
---------David calls. The yearlings are out. Even though I took the cows hay, the fields are dust bowls and there is nothing to graze after the hay is eaten. We talk and he takes some feed in a bucket to entice them back in to the pasture.
---------Alison calls. She, David and Aidan are sick with snuffly colds. We talk about Aidan’s promotion into the three year old class. Their church recognizes each child promoted in big church so all the children are in church for their special moment. Aidan’s school starts this week and they are all ready for the fall schedule to begin.
No rain... grey skies but no rain. Rain in Asheville but no rain here. Dear God who sees the sparrow fall and who knows me inside out, hear my plea for sweet showers of wet muddy blessing. We are covered in red dust and need to be washed clean by rain. Let us feel You filling up the rain barrels of our souls with love and thanksgiving. Thank you for the showers of blessing that have come my way this day and remember me as one of your own children. Peggy