Peace like a river...

Michael is leading a memorial service this afternoon for a young woman who died at the age of twenty seven, killed by a brain tumor she had lived with since she was a child. All of her life was lived with the knowledge of the sleeping giant in her body that might awaken at any time. Her parents loved her, saw that she got the best medical care available and lived with the reality of a beloved child dying before them. She lived life as if she had all the time in the world and not enough time. She grew up, went to college and nursing school, became a cardiac nurse, a very good nurse, found purpose and meaning in her work. But life, as we all know, is not fair. The cancer returned with a vengeance and it could not be checkmated this time.
I sat with the father as he pored over his mother’s Bible, looking for dimly remembered passages on peace. We rambled through the Psalms reading the cries of despair and hope in the songs of David. The gospel of John contained the words he was searching for, the assurance for his heart to rest on as he begins this new journey of grief and loss. “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you; not as the world gives, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” John 14:27
Peace...freedom from disturbance; tranquility; free from anxiety or distress; harmonious relations... dictionary and thesaurus words that are accurate but not true for the soul that is grieving. When one is suffering from the death of a beloved, wandering in the fields of grey days and fountains of tears, passive definitions of peace do nothing to heal the heart. What this father needed, what we all need, is the peace that passes all understanding.
One of my favorite images for peace is contained in the spiritual “Peace Like A River.” The progression of the words is important, I think. The original words, not the folk song versions, contain the secret. It begins with “I’ve got peace like a river,” next “I’ve got joy like a river,” then “I’ve got love like a river.” It all begins with peace, the peace that flows like a river, the peace that comes from our headwaters, God. Peace that is not a passive state of suspended animation but a peace that tumbles and leaps, flows over rocky river beds and smooths out over sandy bottoms, ever changing, ever present, this is the gift of peace from God. Like floating on a kayak on the French Broad, we may bounce around, float lightly upon the waters, even get dumped out into the chilly currents of this mountain river, but the river continues to run inviting us to come on down, dive in, float on the ancient waters.
And when we are able to be at peace, to be peace, to live in peace, God will help us find joy, even after the death and loss of all that we hold dear. This joy will bubble up from the river of peace that flows through our soul. It is not happiness nor is it dependent upon circumstance. It is a joy that chooses to celebrate the gifts of life and offers itself up in praise to the Creator. Joy in my heart, joy in my soul, joyful noise unto the Lord that affirms death is not the final answer. Life is. We can sing the children’s song “I’ve got that joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart,” and mean it.
When we have the gifts of peace and joy, Love comes to us. It is the bedrock, the ground that holds the river in place. Paul Tillich taught us that God is not out there but here, the ground upon which our being, and our rivers, rest and flow. That foundation, that riverbed is Love, God’s ground of being. When we can see and feel and touch and taste God as Love, our peace and joy will be dancing like sunlight on a river, bright dancing sparkling diamonds of peace, joy and love.
As I go to the memorial service this afternoon, I will be praying for this family who are standing on the edge of the river. I will pray for the Advent gifts of peace, joy and love to sustain them in the long days and nights to come. Peace like a river to lift them up when they are sinking down in woe... joysprings to burst up and catch them unaware so that they might remember life is good... and Love to surround them with Her tender arms of comfort and mercy as they continue their journey without this beloved child. May it be so, please, Lord Jesus?